(The Single Woman Series – Batch 2)

I don’t know where this idea for an Article came from really. All I know is that I was eating a snack this afternoon while surfing through Facebook and thinking a bit about relationships and the following thought came to me:

  • It is almost as if God is saying about sex, “I know its beautiful. I know its lovely. But I want you to wait a while until you are married to have it. I need you to trust me on this.” And then, the rebellious are like: “I can’t wait! It sounds too exciting. I want it NOW!” And they have it NOW and miss out on the best because they could not trust God enough to wait, for the right setting of marriage, to have it.

Then the thought came to me:

  • It is much like ice cream. The parent tells the bawling child: “Wait just a little while. I need to place it in the freezer compartment for a while. NOW is not the right time, no matter how nice it looks. I need you to trust me.” The little child cannot wait. He wants it NOW! So, when the mother is not looking, he grabs the cup on the counter which contains liquid-like ice cream (he knows he’ll probably be punished for it later but all that matters to him is satisfying his overwhelming desire for it NOW!) The ice-cream is in need of some freezing but he does not understand that and pours it down his throat. His mummy must be wrong. What sense would waiting make? What sense would it be to place that lovely ice cream in the freezer and just leave it there to sit and to sit. He does not even need a spoon because the texture is so liquid-like. He gulps down the sugar and for sure, it is sweet but the experience he would have had had he waited until it was the right time, had he waited until the ice cream had been given a chance to properly develop, freeze and become firm, he would have enjoyed it a whole lot more, just like his mother had intended.

Life is more than sex. Your worth does not revolve around it despite the lies of the world’s system and the wait is worth it.

I know this because although I’ve never had it but have done some foolish things in the past, I trust my Father’s will and it is his will that I wait. I must wait until he sees it fit for me to be found, to be recognized, to be pursued, to be valued, to be loved, to be propositioned, to be wedded, to be bedded and finally, to be one with the man he has selected for that role.

This leads me to another point: There is a difference between ‘attractive’ and ‘sexy’. So many unmarried young women are trying so hard to look ‘sexy’, by exposing whatever they can and thinking that somehow, this will win a man’s heart. Exposing your cleavage and your body in general may appeal to a guy’s manhood but not his heart. He may be drawn to what you have on display but he will not respect you as a person.

You want a man that will be drawn to your character, your soul, who you are as a person and who is attracted to you on all dimensions.

While single and unmarried, nothing is wrong with wanting to be attractive but you ought not to be trying to be sexy. That is reserved for marriage because sexiness pertains to sex and sex is a benefit that God intended only married people to enjoy.

When the one that God intends for you to marry sees you, he should find something about who you are or how you carry yourself or even something about the way you look, attractive.

However, your sexiness should remain hidden until the time is right. The time will only be right after you have said your ‘I Do’s before God and man and are officially in the honeymoon stage of life. Your sexiness, should be something that man only gets to experience, if he has been fortunate enough to put a wedding ring on your finger. He should only be privileged to see and have access to the precious parts of you that God gave you, AFTER marriage. Your ability to bring his body pleasure, should only be discovered/awakened AFTER you have walked down that aisle.

Until then, continue to wait. By all means, conduct yourself in such a manner as to be attractive to a decent, God-fearing man but keep your sexiness hidden until God confirms that the man he has presented you to is THE ONE and you two make things official through marriage.

The best kind of sexiness, is the one that God approves of. The best kind of ice cream is the one you have waited patiently for.


(Written on 9th March, 2017)

  • Note 9 – ‘Tidbits God Deposited Into My Spirit As A Single Woman’
  • Note 56 – ‘Rebekah, Zipporah And Ruth – How They Got Found’
  • Note 59 – ‘Nine (9) Tips For The Single Woman Hoping To Be Married’
  • Note 72 – ‘Qualities That Got Women Noticed And Eventually Married To Good Men In The Bible’
  • Note 136 – ‘How I Used My Single Years To Pray, Preach, Plan and Prepare‘
  • Note 137 – ‘Serve God Wherever And In Whatever You Are Called
  • Note 253 – ‘Seven (7) Practical Things You Can Do While You Wait On Your Prince Charming
  • Note 254 – ‘Seven (7) Reasons Why You May Still Be Single
  • Note 257 – ‘Looking For A Husband? God Will Not Send…
  • Note 261 -‘Seven (7) Ways To Do Single With A Good Attitude While Hoping To Be Married
  • Note 264 – ‘Lord, Why I’m I Not Being Blessed?
  • Note 268 – ‘When You Don’t Wait On God To Introduce You To Your Spouse’

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