314. WHY I REFUSE TO GIVE UP

(The Single Woman Series – Batch 5)

I thought that things would have looked up for me by now but they haven’t. I’m still single, still having career issues, still encountering quickly dwindling finances and a business that, despite my efforts, seems to be flailing.

As I survey my life, consider my age, where am at and all that I have still not achieved, I realize that everyone has given up on me. They’re tired of me and my issues, think that my troubles have gone on for too long and have practically left me to fend for myself.

To most, I am non-existent. It is as if I had already departed the scene. I go through life feeling somewhat like a ghost, as that is how I am treated by most people.

I can’t blame them. As much as loneliness in the face of ongoing adversity hurts, I understand that people are tired of me and my problems. In fact, I am tired of them as well.

However, I will not give up on myself because no matter how bleak things may look OR how unattainable my goals may seem OR how delayed my dreams and desires OR how impenetrable, formidable and unbreakable that wall in front of me looms OR how sturdy that locked door I face appears (a door which has remained firmly padlocked even after years of trying and crying and praying and pleading), I know from the scriptures and even from my own experiences in the past, that THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE IN JESUS.

He could step in at the last hour and COMPLETELY TRANSFORM a situation. He turned water into wine after all the wine was done, at a Wedding in Cana. He rose Lazarus up from the dead after he was rotting for four days. He gave Hannah a child after years of suffering ridicule and provocation from Penninah because she was barren. He gave Abraham and Sarah strength to conceive a child and gave Sarah strength to deliver, after many years of having no child of their own and when they were very old in age. He did the same for Zechariah and Elizabeth.

I know therefore, that no matter how things look and how weary I admittedly feel, that there is still hope for me. I know that all it takes is for the Lord to will it and at his word, my life could change. At his word, I could be released from my long lasting captivity of tumultous and adverse circumstances and be allowed to experience a new season. At his word, my life could be completely transformed.

While he is not obligated to do it, I know that he is all-powerful, that he is the same yesterday, today and forever, that with him, nothing shall be impossible and absolutely nothing is too hard for him to do. In light of all this, I therefore hope in HIM.

In the Bible, Blind Bartimaeus knew first hand, the ‘hell’ he was going through on a daily basis as a blind person. He knew what it felt like to be poverty-stricken, unable to help himself, to probably be ridiculed by passersby, scorned, hungry, tired, weak, the loneliness, feeling like a vile mess in his condition and facing each day with no hope of ever being delivered from all that he was going through. Then, an opportunity presented itself suddenly, when he heard that Jesus was passing that way. He knew, from this man’s track record and what he had heard about him, that he could heal him. Nobody else could help him but Jesus could.

This was why he started screaming to the top of his lungs when Jesus was approaching, so as to get his attention. One can only imagine the depth of pain inside, as he cried out for the Lord to have mercy on him. People couldn’t see his bleeding, hurting heart but God could.

This was an opportunity that blind Bartimaeus would not let pass by. Whether he had eaten or not was tired or not, weak or not, he mustered up all his strength and gave it all that he had. He cried out to Jesus, who he referred to as ‘the Son of David’, begging him to have mercy on him.

He knew that if he failed to cry out, that Jesus would pass by and possibly never pass that way again and he would be confined to his suffering for a lifetime. This was why when the people around him told him to just shut up, suggesting from their actions that he was a lost cause, that he was too unimportant and insignificant and perhaps too far gone for Jesus to take the time to notice him and to help him, that he, Bartimaeus, screamed the more.

He hoped in the Lord’s mercy and when everyone told him to just be silent, he refused to give up.

The Word of God states of Jesus:

  • “And it came to pass, that as he was come nigh unto Jericho, a certain blind man sat by the way side begging: And hearing the multitude pass by, he asked what it meant. And they told him, that Jesus of Nazareth passeth by. And he cried, saying, Jesus, thou son of David, have mercy on me. And they which went before rebuked him, that he should hold his peace: but he cried so much the more, Thou son of David, have mercy on me.”

As a result of his perseverance which was fuelled by his faith, even in the face of what looked like a pathetic existence, blind Bartimaeus blocked out the noise of the naysayers and made his petition. He knew that they could say what they liked and think what they liked but that all he needed that day to get his miracle was the attention of one, the mercy of one, the power of one: AND THAT ONE WAS JESUS.

His faith literally gave way to sight. For, Jesus, knowing all things, knew his heart, knew his condition, knew his pain. He may have been a long time in that condition but at Jesus’ words, he was healed.

After screaming out to the Lord and refusing to shut up, the Word of God states:

  • And Jesus stood, and commanded him to be brought unto him: and when he was come near, he asked him, Saying, What wilt thou that I shall do unto thee? And he said, Lord, that I may receive my sight. And Jesus said unto him, Receive thy sight: thy faith hath saved thee. And immediately he received his sight, and followed him, glorifying God: and all the people, when they saw it, gave praise unto God.” (Luke 18:35-43)

I will therefore take a page out of the book of Bartimaeus. I will continue to hope in Jesus. I will block out the noise of the naysayers. I will continue to petition the throne of grace with my requests, peradventure, that I might find mercy, help and healing in my situation, even as Bartimaeus did.

I refuse to give up because I know that my Redeemer lives and I know that he can truly make a difference in my life. Who can tell how close I could be to my miracle?

Is it too late for him to intervene? I think not. Yet, even if he never intervenes to change my situation (which is his prerogative as sovereign Lord) and I experience these tumults for a lifetime and that new season I’ve hoped for and dreamed about for years, never materializes, I know that I will be okay.

It will be difficult for sure but the Lord will strengthen me. I will feel tired most definitely and sometimes saddened but the Lord will uphold me. The joy of the Lord will be my strength and so, praise will not depart from my lips. “…For I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day.”

(Written on 12th and 13th May, 2022)

Dear Reader, if you found the above Article to be interesting, informative, beneficial or edifying, you may also be interested in reading the following:

  • Note 14 – ‘Feeling Depressed? Realign Your Focus!’
  • Note 42 – ‘When That Door Wouldn’t Budge’
  • Note 50 – ‘Making Sense Of The Awful Stillness – The Process Of Metamorphosis’
  • Note 70 – ‘Has He Forgotten Me?’
  • Note 31 – ‘God Loves Persistence – Fight On!’
  • Note 112 – ‘Lessons I Have Learned From The Lazarus Story’
  • Note 171 – ‘If That Tree Could Talk’
  • Note 174 – ‘They Can Think Whatever They Like – God Will Do Whatever He Pleases.’
  • Note 195 – ‘When God Promises To Write-On A Write-Off’
  • Note 196 – ‘A Hopeless End Or An Endless Hope?’
  • Note 197 – ‘Left For Dead…Then Resurrected’
  • Note 279 – ‘Do You Feel Disappointed By God?’
  • Note 290 – ‘Blessings When We Refuse To Let Go’
  • Note 298 – ‘Arm Yourself: Suffering Is Part of The Christian’s Story’
  • Note 305 – ‘The Lady With The Issue Of Blood’

Also, under the ‘BIBLE-BELIEVING Daughters’ page:

  • Note 222 – ‘Frustration In His Silence’

Additionally, under the ‘BROKEN Daughters’ page:

  • Note 33 – ‘A Comeback Better Than Before’

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