303. WHAT IS LOVE, REALLY?

(The Abundant Life Series – Batch 3)

I’ve dealt with the issue of love before in previous Articles and in depth. However, tonight, I heard a Pastor on a programme give a definition that was brief but spot on, in terms of accuracy.

He said:

“Love demands an object…”For God so loved the world THAT HE GAVE …” Love is always looking for an opportunity to express itself.” (Pastor J. Redlin)

This is true of love and since love needs to outpour itself to someone or some object, from this we can conclude that love, true love is SELFLESS. That is, true love is not about getting. It is about GIVING. It is not about being attended to. It is about SERVING. It is not about catering to one’s self and one’s needs or investing in one’s future and seeking one’s own interests. On the contrary, it is about catering to the needs of others, pursuing their interests and investing selflessly (without an ulterior motive or expectation of return), in another.

It is important to note that the ACT itself or DOING does not define or encapsulate love. For, it is possible to put on a grand performance but yet have no bowels of compassion towards the object of the act and to be motivated instead by selfish, self-centred motives.

Rather, love is that which will produce actions. That is, while nice and kind acts are not necessarily evidence of love, where love genuinely is, it will be evidenced by nice and kind acts. It is not something that can be hidden therefore. It is not something that one has to wonder if it exists or go searching, hunting and digging for, like with a treasure, in the hope that one might get a glimpse.

No. Chances are if one has to go hunting, digging and searching to find love in another, its because the love is not there. For, love cannot hide itself and it does not walk around disguised or undercover. It does not boast or announce itself but people know when it is present.

Neither is love something that one has to overthink and strategize, so as to ensure that people ‘see’. This is nothing but performance for man’s applause and it is not love. For, love does not work up itself to be seen. It is seen without deliberately going out of its way to do things to be noticed.

Sincere love is that which naturally or automatically flows from within, simply because it’s there. One doesn’t have to go fishing for it or wonder if it is there and it does not need to use a loudspeaker (so-to-speak), to announce its whereabouts. Once it exists within, it manifests itself without.

Love at its highest was demonstrated in the SACRIFICE that God the Father made in sending his only begotten Son to earth to die for the sins of an undeserving world. It was also demonstrated in his Son Jesus Christ, willingly coming to earth, not to be ministered unto but to SERVE and to OFFER HIMSELF UP SACRIFICIALLY on the cross through death, as an atonement for our sins.

God the Father and the Son did not have to do what they did but out of love for us and our eternal welfare, they did. John 3:16 states, “For God so LOVED the world, that he GAVE his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish but have everlasting life.” In Matthew 20:28, Jesus also stated of himself, “…the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but TO MINISTER, and TO GIVE his life a ransom for many.”

Alas, due to love, Jesus gave his life and endured the cross (though despising the shame), for the joy that was set before him (Hebrews 12:2). For, in him dying, all who believed on him and that he rose from the dead, would be forgiven of their sins and live eternally (Romans 10:9-13).

What wondrous love is this!

The love that we have (if we truly have it), ought to imitate this excellent three-pronged attribute of selflessness, service and sacrifice.

Some other peripheral attributes of love are that love forgives, love is merciful, love tells the truth. Love is kind, caring and considerate. It genuinely wants the best for others and weeps and rejoices with others, when they weep or rejoice. It does not enjoy or entertain itself in the pain and troubles of others, nor does it delight to do violence to another through malicious lips, in the form of gossip, badmouthing, insulting and tale-bearing.

Love does not discriminate or have a respecter of persons mentality but sees all people as equally important, valuable in the sight of God and all of whom Jesus died to save from their sins. In fact, love has a genuine desire to share the good news of the gospel so that others can benefit from God’s free offer of salvation (through faith in his Son Jesus Christ) and in so doing, avoid the damnation of hell.

1 Corinthians 13, in describing the attributes of love (charity) and that if we don’t have it, that all that we do or claim to be doing for the Lord is useless, reminds us that:

“Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and HAVE NOT CHARITY, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and HAVE NOT CHARITY, I am nothing.And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and HAVE NOT CHARITY, it profiteth me nothing.

Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.Charity never faileth…”

Romans 12:9-15 also tells us:

“Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good. Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another; Not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord; Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer; Distributing to the necessity of saints; given to hospitality. Bless them which persecute you: bless, and curse not. Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.” (Romans 12:9-15)

Finally, of the love that is supposed to characterize the lives of those who claim to believe on Jesus Christ, God’s Word states in 1 John 3:11-18:

“For this is the message that ye heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. Not as Cain, who was of that wicked one, and slew his brother. And wherefore slew he him? Because his own works were evil, and his brother’s righteous…We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love the brethren. He that loveth not his brother abideth in death.Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer: and ye know that no murderer hath eternal life abiding in him.

Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.But whoso hath this world’s good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his BOWELS OF COMPASSION from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; BUT IN DEED AND IN TRUTH.”

Dear Reader, if you found the above Article to be interesting, informative or edifying, you may also be interested in the following under the ‘COURTING OR ENGAGED Daughters’ Page:

(Written on 24th October, 2021)