(The Called To Be A Wife Series – Batch 3)

Tonight, after considering how the standards of Christianity and the fundamentals which seemed to be once firmly entrenched and securely girded around us in the past are now slipping all around us and down a slope like melted ice and that many seemed not to see it happening or care for that matter, I found myself praying again about the choice of a husband with fervency because it was so important to me that I get it right, if I was to marry.

I wanted a man that was like-minded and serious about the things that pertained to my Lord. Good looks, coming from a good family, having a good job or a good bank account or anything else that is considered good to possess, means nothing to me if a man is not on fire for Christ and does not love the things that pertain to his Kingdom, like his Word.

I wanted a man that loved God and the Lord Jesus Christ more than anything else on this earth, who was committed to the Lord and his will, first and foremost and took Christianity seriously. Absolutely nobody else would do, for I could only truly respect such a man.

Knowing how important this issue was for me, to the point where I valued the spiritual connection as more important than the emotional and the physical (although these are also important), I prayed again to the Lord, as I have on occasions in the past because I wanted to end up with THE RIGHT ONE. I prayed something along the following lines:

  • “Father in heaven, please provide a husband that holds fast to the standards of your Word, someone that is passionate about your Kingdom and loves truth, whose leadership I can trust and under whom I can sit safely and be taught because he teaches truth. Provide a man that truly has the Spirit of Christ in him and not a counterfeit spirit, in Jesus’ name, Amen.”

As often as these sort of prayers come to mind, I am going to pray them in my singleness because as I said before, I don’t want to get it wrong. I don’t want to make the mistake or experience the nightmare of waking up and realizing that I am not with a man that was sent by God, as his perfect will for my life.

I know that the man God sends will lovingly push me closer to the Lord and that is the man I am waiting for. Anybody else will make me live a life of regret because I got it wrong.

By God’s grace, I will use this time that I have as a single woman, to pray, not so much about what I want in a husband but what I know I need. In short, I want a man that, when we come together, we are so agreed on the fundamentals of Christianity and so passionate about God’s Word, his truth and his Ministry, that we are a POWERHOUSE FOR CHRIST.

In either 2017 or 2018, I wrote: “I don’t just want a marriage. I want a POWERHOUSE for Christ.”

This has remained on my heart throughout the years as I wait on God to provide a spouse for me. Any other kind of union is completely out of the question. I need ours to be a marriage of equals spiritually, in that I am with a man that either matches my spiritual momentum or exceeds it.

I don’t want cold and I don’t want lukewarm. I want someone that is hot for Christ, serious about the commission and committed to the vocation wherewith he has been called in Christ. I refuse to think about any other kind of marriage and so, to make sure that I get it right, I am relying on God to choose for me and asking him for exactly what I need, which I believe is glorifying to HIM.

This is why on 9th April 2021, before I had written all of what I just wrote above, I wrote:

  • “I would rather remain single (and I mean it), than to marry a man without SUBSTANCE. I don’t mean material possessions. I mean, does he posses the SPIRIT OF CHRIST? And if he does is he on FIRE and PASSIONATE about the things of the Lord, moreso than his own things? Does he love TRUTH and is he PREPARED TO SACRIFICE whatever, be it job, so-called ‘opportunities’ and what the world has to offer, for the sake of Christ? I am and I have and I need a man that is like-minded.
  • I want a connection on all three dimensions: Spiritual, Emotional and Physical but I’ve come to desire that the SPIRITUAL CONNECTION IN THE LORD JESUS CHRIST be the strongest. May the good Lord choose for me. I know not the hearts of men and so I cannot choose unilaterally for myself.”

On another note, on 13th December, 2021, I suddenly felt like typing another note to my future husband and so I did! I wrote of the kind of man I know he is bound to be, as I cannot settle for anyone that is less. I wrote:

  • Dear future husband,
  • You are my best friend, my laughing mate, my fun times buddy; my prayer pal, my study the Word comrade, my fellow co-worker in God’s heavenly vineyard. You are my supporter, my encourager, my constructive criticizer; a man who truly cares about my holistic well-being and desires to see me succeed in this life. You are my life companion, my confidante, my irreplaceable earthly gem, my love.
  • After Jesus, who is my number one, you, my darling are my second to one. I thank God for you. I respect and admire you. I feel humbled to have crossed your path; blessed to know you as a person, favoured to have been handpicked by God to be your wife and honoured, so honoured, that you are mine.
  • I know that you’re not perfect but I believe that God has graced me to deal with your imperfections and you, mine. Such is the beauty of a union built by God.

(Written on 29th January, 2022)

Dear Reader, if you found the above Article to be interesting, informative, edifying or beneficial, you may also be interested in reading the following under the ‘BIBLE-BELIEVING Daughters Page:

  • Note 2014 – I Would Thou Wert Cold Or Hot’

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