141. DEAR CHRISTIAN, EVER FELT LIKE YOU HAD NO ONE?

(The Faith Forum Series – Batch 3)

When you’re down and out or having a low day or moment or season, as a Christian, you may wish you could find a body of believers or at least just one with whom you can confide, share your load, cry on their shoulder and ask for help.

For some believers, thankfully, they have been able to find such people. God has blessed them with such a wonderful support system.

However, truthfully speaking, for others, the reality they face is that the people that surround them (including those who have professed themselves to be fellow Christians) are too gossip-oriented, selfish, hell-bent on seeing them declared a failure, non-forgiving, competitive, envious, malicious, self-righteous, self-absorbed, judgmental, prideful, worldly, earthly-focused, flawed in their philosophy on life and what they consider to be important in it or stunted in their own spiritual maturity, their knowledge of God and how he operates, to be of any worthwhile assistance.

Many of the problems you are going through and the attacks you face regularly, they could not even begin to understand because they are so comfortable in the false comforts that the world offers and seemingly, have never faced what you are going through or have been through.

They have a decent job, money in the bank, a house, a car, a spouse and a family. They look at you as if you are a foreigner or you are lower than the lows if you don’t have these things, bearing an expression that loudly states: “Problems, what problems? What exactly are problems? We have had issues here and there yes but we’ve never faced anything major in our lives as Christians for Christ or maybe we’ve forgotten. Things are so nice now, that we are in relax mode.”

Some even point that judgmental finger at you, as if to say accusingly, “Problems? WHY problems? You must have sinned and are facing what you are going through because you are being punished or out of favour with God or condemned…or maybe you were never saved in the first place.”

Others consider you as cursed by God. Despite how much God has blessed me in my life from my mother’s womb to now, a lady at a Church Convention I attended was of the view that I was not being blessed by God because I was still single. She came up to me on the very first day of the year 2019 and let me know within the earshot of others, that she hoped that God would ‘bless’ me this year.

Hoping that God blesses someone is good but given who said it and what I know she considers important in this life and other conversations she has had with me and others about my singleness, I knew she meant that because no husband had yet come on the horizon and that I had no secular job at the moment, that I was under a horrible curse from God.

Mind you, she didn’t know that just a few weeks prior, God had ‘blessed’ me with two (2) years’ or twenty four (24) months’ backpay from my previous job, due to a significant increase in the salary that was to be paid retroactively. She did not know that they also increased the figure of the Transport Allowance I had received for that two (2) year period and decided to include a brand new allowance called a Special Allowance, which meant that they had two (2) years backpay for me in relation to these allowances as well.

This resulted in my obtaining close to $400,000 dollars gross when you added the gratuity payment they owed me (which was also going to increase as a result of the salary increase because it is calculated as a percentage of your earnings).

The lady didn’t know that I had been busy planning for a multifaceted future business, that would enable me to use many of the talents God gave me and even some of the skills I learned formally through my education.

She didn’t know that, based on what I believe, the Lord already let me know directly from his Word some years ago, that he called me ‘Hephzibah’, that I would be a joyful mother of children some day and that me and my children would increase and increase. Surely that must mean that a man is on the horizon, as appointed by God for me, although I had not yet met him but she did not know this.

She didn’t know that I had in my heart such a vision for the future, that once God helped me, if she was still around to see it materialize when it did, it would blow her mind in shock by the beauty if it all.

What do you do with such people?

Well, for starters, you don’t argue or present your case. You hurt a little yes, when you see how foolish their outlook on life is and know that they ought to know better. Yet, you must just leave them to their folly, pray for them, commit your plans to God and trust that he will judge all things righteously.

When you feel like no one understands what you are going through and all that you are dealing with in your spiritual journey here on earth, you must do like David and encourage yourself in the Lord. For, at times, if you are not careful, you can forget the goodness and promises of God over your life and be discouraged by the words of negativity that flow from people, even good people you expected would know better.

I spent the rest of that evening in January 2019, the very first day of the year, feeling down in the dumps because of what the lady had told me and also the negative words of two other people.

Sadly, I woke up this morning in the same condition.

I have had quite a number of valley experiences over the years and it has made me realize that encouragement is a rare virtue today, even for the Christian. There is an abundance of negativity, criticism, judgment, scorn, condemnation, presumption, misunderstanding, dismissal and rejection but not much encouragement or understanding.

I pray to God that he sends a proper support system for me soon because sometimes, you need people who are like-minded when it comes to spiritual matters, who you know genuinely care for you and your soul, who would not go spread your business maliciously but would pray with you, cry with you, hug you, console you, understand you, spend time with you, encourage you and be rooted for your heavenly success.

(Written on 02nd January, 2019)

P.S. After I wrote this note, I went to Church and received a card surprisingly from a sister in the faith and aunt. I never gave her details of all that I was going through at the moment but she sought to comfort me in terms of what she did know about my situation. I was so surprised. I realized that this was some encouragement that God was sending my way, after I wrote what I wrote today. He saw me down in the dumps and he sent me a little something to lift my mood!

Thank you Lord! I appreciate it.

I pray that God blesses that sister in all of her endeavours. What she did for me is very uncommon to find today and I appreciate it.

Dear Reader, if the above Article was of interest to you or you found it to be informative, edifying or beneficial, you may also wish to read the following Articles:

  • Note 70 – ‘The Pain I Felt In My Series Of Pit Experiences’
  • Note 135  ‘My Prayer For Deliverance From Solitude And For Positive
    Relationships’

Additional Article under the ‘SINGLE Daughters of God’ Page:

  • Note 277 – ‘When Family Disappoints’

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